My Story
Where in the world do I begin?
I was skinny once, up until the ripe age of 5. Yes, that's right. I have been overweight as long as I can remember. My mom likes to tell me stories about how when I was younger than 5 I would constantly push my plate away saying "No, I don't want to get fat." If only that mindset and will power would have stuck with me all through my life....
Anyway, all through school I was the "nice fat girl" that everyone talked to. I remember my first day of school one of the boys stood next to me and said "You're HUGE." Because I was not only pudgy, I was tall. However, I never lacked in the friends department because I did have a good personality and I was nice to everyone. Even the kids that nobody else would be nice to. I continued to gain weight all through grade school and I remember when I was in 5th grade my mom took me to a store and I was already in a women's size 12 dress. SIZE 12 DRESS. WOMEN'S. Even typing this out now brings me great shame.
When I got to Jr. High school I had a growth spurt. I went up, not out. That was nice. I was basically a size 12-14 but I was at least 5'6 if not close to my now 5'8 size. I remember being taller than all of my friends and most of the guys in school. Even though I evened out a little bit, it didn't make kids nicer to me. The meanest thing that ever happened to me in Jr. High was when a boy pulled my chair out from under me when I was going to sit down and then screamed earthquake when I hit the floor. I remember I really liked my teacher in that class and I will never forget the look on his face and how mad he was at the other kid. In fact, I think he wanted to punch him right then and there... but he was a teacher after all.
My freshman year of High School I remember wearing a size 15/16 pants. When my dad's job forced my family to move to bumfricknowhere, (Taylorville) Illinois, I got really depressed. So did my family. I remember my mom and dad being unhappy as the rest of us. So, as you can imagine.... I gained more weight. I made friends quickly though and did alright in school. When I graduated High School I wore a size 20/22 and weighed over 250 pounds. My all time high. As you can imagine, I didn't have a lot of self esteem and never had a boyfriend. In fact, I didn't even have my first kiss with a boy until I was 19. But I digress.... Keep in mind that I did work at Wendy's all through High School and spent majority of my free time there. So, obviously.... I ate Wendy's a LOT. Not the healthy stuff either. This is what my favorite meal consisted of:
1 doublestack, 5-piece nugget, medium fry, cheese sauce and a regular cherry pepsi.
And I ate EVERY LAST CRUMB.
So, when I finally quit Wendy's because I got a better job, I remember having an insomniac night where I couldn't sleep and I was watching a show on MTV called "Best Video Games". Dance Dance Revolution was one of those video games and the girl on there had lost 200 pounds just by playing the game. WHAT?! I immediately went to my computer and ordered the game and two mats. Needless to say, my mom and I played that game religiously and just by doing that (not changing my eating) I dropped 2 dress sizes. We went on a cruise that summer and I actually felt really good wearing my size 16 clothes.
After we got back, I still played DDR but my mom had the idea to sign up for WeightWatchers on line. Instead of paying for memberships for me, her and my dad, she bought hers and the calculators, etc. and we all just used her information. That's when I really started to see weight loss. I got down to 216.6. Then, I finally got my first boyfriend. I was 22 years old.
I decided then and there that I wasn't going to look the way I was anymore and signed up for WeightWatchers meetings with my mom. In the first 3 months I lost 21 pounds. That was without exercising! After that, it was all downhill from there. From 2007 - 2010 I got myself down to 159.2 pounds from my 216.6.
So, from High School to the summer of 2010 I lost 90.8 pounds. I felt amazing. Plus, in the summer of 2010 I got engaged! I got married on 5.28.2011 to my best friend (and my first boyfriend) and I wore a size 10 wedding dress and size 10 and Medium clothes on my honeymoon. I wasn't ashamed to be seen in a swimming suit on my cruise or on the beach. I was confident and happy.
Also, I discovered a love for running and have since completed two half marathons. One being the Disney Princess Half Marathon in Orlando which was the most rewarding experience of my life. I have never felt more proud of myself. (It was my first half)
However, there's a downturn in all of this because I have, in the past two years, gained that weight back. All the way up to 240 pounds. Why? Well, those are my demons that I have had to face and come to terms with. My weight will probably always be a struggle, but as long as I am willing and ready to fight.... I know that I can accomplish what I once did. I don't want my weight to define me and I do not want food to rule my decisions. This is something I will do for myself that nobody can take away from me. Whether it takes me 10 times or 100.
