I had gone from 250 down to 159.2. 90.8 pounds lost in about 5 years. I lost most of it from 2007-2010 and then maintained it through the wedding and honeymoon in 2011. Andrew was so supportive during the time it took me to lose that weight. He dated me when I was bigger, watched me get smaller, and then supported me and my lifestyle to help me stay at that weight.
Now here I am. I almost, ALMOST, gained that 90.8 pounds back. It seems so strange how quickly it goes on but guess what? I gained that weight in a 2 year span. It really isn't that crazy once you think about it. I didn't gain it over night and I'm not going to lose it over night.
My husband has never said anything to me about gaining almost all of the weight back. He has never said he didn't love me anymore, he has never said that I'm hideous or fat, he has never been demeaning in any way. He stands by my side and tells me that he loves me. He knows I'm not happy and he just wants me to be happy again. He has said that numerous times to me. He wants me to be happy, be active, be the person I was when we were getting ready to be married and he always asks how he can help. I'm so thankful for him every single day because he makes me feel good regardless of how I feel about myself. He's even helped me to set some goals and rewards for when I hit certain milestones.
This is the most recent grouping of photographs that I have of Andrew and I from Valerie's wedding that was in October. I've lost weight since then - but it is about how I look right now. And you know what? That's who I am right now. This is the hardest thing to accept when you're bigger but I can accept it. That is how I look right now, it does not define me or who I am as a person. It does not dictate my talents and my abilities in life. It is just how I look. I FEEL healthy (most days). I'm still eating the right foods and taking care of myself the way I know how and I will get to a point where I'm happy in my skin again. But right now, that's me. I'm happy with me. I love myself and what I have to offer and some extra pounds are NOT going to make me hate myself anymore.
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Friday Weigh In & Foodie Food:
Weigh In: -1.9
Total Lost: 10.3
Left to Lose: 89.7
Woohoo! Hit that 10 pound milestone! I'm in a new decade too! I didn't really set a reward for losing 10 pounds but I'm super excited and am going to try to convince Andrew to let me get some primer from Ulta. I'm almost out of my Benefit Pore-fessional!
Yesterday went really well. We ended up having Wendy's before Orchestra and I had enough points for everything I got and then didn't eat the rest of the evening. I wasn't hungry at all. I was mostly tired. I think I made myself tired because I kept thinking about how awesome my pillow and sleep mask were. Ha! I made myself stay awake until 10:00 by reading and watching my favorite make up gals on YouTube and then called it a night. I was asleep almost instantly. That never happens to me! I woke up one minute before my alarm went off. Haha!
Today's Menu:
B: 1 c Horizon organic milk, Chobani Flip blueberry power
S: Cheese Sticks
L: Tortellini soup, salad with homemade dressing, dark chocolate square
S: RF Wheat Thins and a Laughing Cow cheese wedge
D: Fresh salmon, baked potato, broccoli
Activity: Nada
Andrew told me last night on our way to orchestra that he will support me and exercise in the mornings before work if I do. I'd love to be a morning workout person because then it's done, out of the way, and when I get home from work I can just veg out. So, we'll kick off on Monday by getting up at 5:30 and doing some kind of exercise. Most likely a DVD until the weather gets nicer. (We're in a winter storm watch until Monday now.....) I told him to check out T25 as well. Just in case we sleep a little longer than 5:30 and don't have as much time. A kickass 25 minute workout would be spectacular for those mornings.
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I have nothing else to update besides we are probably going to be hermits this weekend because of the weather. We were invited to a birthday celebration this weekend which isn't far from our apartment so we will probably still make that - unless it is absolutely terrible out. I know Andrew has his heart set on Osaka... he's love the Hibachi.....
Have a wonderful weekend, everyone. Stay warm!!!
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